This is a sign!

I know a lot people who collect things. Some things are normal, like coffee mugs, rocks, shot glasses, t-shirts, or even salt and pepper shakers. I am cheap, so I collect pictures of funny signs. Some of the cheesiest signs are church marquees.  I don’t know who comes up with them, but they usually make me laugh. Even when they’re serious.

Not the person that did this sign!

This one is just cheesy.

But every once in a while, church signs are encouraging.  This last Wednesday was my last day of work, and as I left I got stuck in a HUGE traffic jam. For an hour and a half I waited as everyone had to exit the highway and take an alternate route. As I sat in traffic, I started to pray, thinking of all the things that need to happen in the next 2-3 months before leaving for Bolivia.  I was starting to realize that I was completely unemployed, and completely dependent on the Lord to provide. I was confident that I was where I needed to be, but at the same time, I was unsure of how it was going to happen.

Then as I was sitting in traffic, I noticed a church sign on the side of the road. It was electronic, so it flashed a few words at a time, “ DO NOT FEAR – I AM WITH YOU- DO NOT BE DISMAYED – I AM YOUR GOD- I WILL STRENGTHEN YOU- AND HELP YOU – I WILL UPHOLD YOU- WITH MY RIGHT HAND” and then traffic moved. I thanked God for the reminder, and made a note to look up the verse when I got home.

30 minutes later I was still sitting in traffic, and had started to make a to-do list in my mind. As I made my list in my head, I started to get anxious again. Then I felt my phone buzz. Because I was in traffic that wasn’t moving, I picked it up to see an email from a mentor. She was checking in to see how I was doing, and shared a verse with me. Someone had shared this verse with her 18 years before as she and her family moved to Bolivia. “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. “  Isaiah 41:10
Well, no need to look it up anymore! What are the chances that in a span of 30 minutes in traffic I would be reminded of the same verse two times! The Lord is so faithful to remind us of His faithfulness and goodness when we forget. How encouraging that God speaks to us…even if He has to shut down the highway and repeat himself for us to listen!
 
**If you are interested in giving to what the Lord is doing in Bolivia through me, I would love to talk with you more! **
To give a monthly or one time gift online, please visit https://web.simusa.org/give/index.php?FundID=042110-001&LNme=Graves&Dsg=Support 

En el amanecer y el anochecer!

And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light.  God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness. God called the light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day.” Genesis 1:3-5

In the last few years, the Lord has often used stories and analogies to teach me more about who He is. I don’t know how many times I've read this verse, but when I really started to think about it, its pretty crazy, and also really vague. When God decided to make light - it happened. When he decided to make the darkness - that happened. It says that He separated the light and the darkness, but it doesn't really explain how that happened, and that’s okay.

As I was thinking about the sunrise and sunset, God reminded me that speed is not most important but our praise. I am by no means an expert on the rotation of the planets, or anything else really. But, I do know that God is powerful, and he easily could have snapped his fingers each day to separate the darkness from the light. He could have just made a rule that at 8:30 PM, the sun and the moon switch places. God has the power to do things quickly and efficiently.

But instead, he choose to make it pretty. He allows the sun to set and rise slowly overtime, and He does the same thing in our lives. He could make things happen with a word, but he doesn't always. He allows things to happen over time, so that we can trust Him. So that we can see the colors that it makes. Just like a sunrise or a sunset, so much beauty would be lost if God allowed things to just happen with a snap of His fingers. 

As I began the support raising process, I had high hopes that God would snap his fingers and provide for every need. But I am so thankful He hasn't! The last month has taught me so much about what it looks like to be completely dependent on God. There have been moments when I cried in frustration with myself, but there have been countless moments where I have been blown away by God’s faithfulness to provide.

It has been so encouraging to me to be reminded in sunsets and sunrises that our God is not about efficiency or speed. He is powerful, but He is also the God that created the world. He really does make beautiful things, and makes all things beautiful in His time, not my own. I pray that you would be encouraged to remember that God is in charge of everything and He is good! :)

Awesome Things I Didn't Expect!

“For when you did awesome things that we did not expect, you came down, and the mountains trembled before you.” Isaiah 64:3

Hello friends!
I have been reading in Isaiah, and at the beginning of this week, I wrote this verse at the top of my planner. Even though I KNOW God is powerful and can do awesome things, I don’t normally expect Him to.

As most of you know, I am in the process or raising financial and prayer support in order to move to Bolivia. In the past when I have gone to Bolivia or Mexico, I knew I was dependent on the Lord for financial support, but I also felt somewhat capable of doing it myself. I have spent the last 5 years saving for the time I would move to a different country; however, as I have prepared to MOVE to Bolivia, my dependence on the Lord has been tested. No longer is it something I am able to do, but something only God could do-which is probably how it should be. :)

Anyway, when I went to training several weeks ago in North Carolina, I was told that the visa for Bolivia can take up to three months to receive. I did some quick math, and realized that meant I needed to apply by April 15. Then I learned that I needed to be at 70% of my monthly budget before applying for the visa. Once again, my math skills told me that was highly unlikely to raise 70% of my budget in the next 4 weeks.

BUT GOD IS ABLE. Over the last few weeks, I have been overwhelmed by so many people that are willing to pray, and give of their resources to invest in what God is doing through me in Bolivia.
Then this morning I got a phone call that reminded me that God does do awesome things that I don’t expect. I had applied this week to receive support from my church in Denton, The Village. I knew it was a long process to get approved, and so I didn’t expect to be able to have it before I could apply for the visa. This morning I found out that I was “accidentally” included on the budget for this year already!!

What a great reminder that God was not surprised by the timeline of the visa or anything else. He has clearly led me to this point, and I am blown away by the ways He has provided through my friends, family, and even strangers. Within 2 weeks He has provided 40% of my monthly budget!! Thank you so much for your prayers, God is at work doing awesome things!

Please pray that God would continue to provide the rest of the support to apply for the visa, and monthly financial supporters as well.

Love you all!

If you are interested in giving monthly, this is a breakdown of what is left!
$100 monthly – 4 People
$50 monthly- 11 People
$25 monthly – 20 People

Mount Tunari, Cochabamba, Bolivia

The Cost

Over the last few weeks, I have been listening to a song called “The Cost” by The Rend Collective Experiment.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2TxahqbSbU

The song is based on the passage in Luke that says:

“If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.  Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple. For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it? Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, saying, ‘This man began to build and was not able to finish.’  Or what king, going out to encounter another king in war, will not sit down first and deliberate whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who comes against him with twenty thousand?  And if not, while the other is yet a great way off, he sends a delegation and asks for terms of peace.  So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple.” Luke 14:26-33

Several weeks ago I heard a sermon about these verses, and the pastor talked about the two different costs that Jesus speaks of in Luke. In the first case, the man does not build a tower until he is sure he can complete it. In the other case, the king at war finds that the cost of going to war is too great, and that he cannot afford to pay it. The pastor reminded us that the cost to follow Jesus is great, and we must be willing to pay it. At the same time, the cost of not following Jesus is TOO great. Whatever the cost might be of following Jesus, the cost of not following Him is higher.

All through training, I have been thinking about these verses. Last night after dinner I sat at a table with other people at training at SIM. We talked for over an hour and I was overwhelmed with story after story of God’s faithfulness. Although we have had lots of trainings over the last few days, one of the most helpful things about training at SIMGo has been listening to the stories of people that have years of combined experience in ministry. Over and over and over, they have told of trials and suffering, and the message is always the same. Whatever the cost, Jesus is worth it!

I am so thankful for this time, and for your prayers. Please pray that the Lord would continue to prepare my heart, and the hearts of the people in Bolivia to know His love more and more, and the things we hold onto in this world less and less.

Hello from North Carolina!

For the next two weeks I will be in Charlotte, North Carolina for SIMGo! I will be learning more about support raising, meeting other missionaries, and learning more about what it will be like to serve with SIM in Bolivia!

Friday I left DFW and felt like a tourist in my own city! Airports are so exciting, and there’s something about them that makes me feel really small, but also more aware of how big God is. I ended up at the wrong terminal, so I got to use the Skylink for the first time in Dalllas! I got on the plane, and ended up in between a group of pastors from the East coast. It was so encouraging to hear them talk about how God has called them into ministry, and how He is working in the communities they are in.

I arrived in Charlotte, and a couple from SIM picked me up at the airport and brought me back to the residence hall. I will be staying with 17 other adults, and 12 children that are also in the process of going all over the world. So exciting! Several people that were here in January for SIMStart (orientation) will be here again this week, so it will be great to see them again too!

I will do my best to keep you updated (but not TOO updated) throughout the next two weeks! I listed some ways to be praying, if there is anything I can be praying about for you let me know! I would love to be praying for you as well. J

**WAYS TO PRAY**

Praise God for this time that He has provided, that He might use it as a time of learning and growth for myself and the other missionaries.

That we would continue to be dependent on God through prayer, rather than looking to our own abilities or strength.

For creativity and wisdom as we learn about communicating well at home and cross-culturally!         

SIM: Serving In Mission

A lot has happened since the last time I wrote! The Lord has been so gracious during the last few months to lead and guide, and I am so thankful for you all, the people He has used to challenge, encourage, and convict me along the way.

While I was in Bolivia this last summer, I had the opportunity to meet a lot of different people working with many ministries. One of the organizations is called SIM, (Serving in Mission, or Society for International Missions – depending on the country!)

SIM is a sending agency for missions that has about 1600 missionaries from more than 50 countries working in 65 countries around the world. One of the neatest things to me about SIM is that there are missionaries from countries all over the world, not just the United States!

The orphanage I was able to work with these last two summers is just down the street from one of SIM’s missionary schools. I heard a lot about it while I was there, and when I came home, it kept showing up again and again. In September I wrote to SIM and several other sending agencies asking for information, and SIM was one of the few I heard back from quickly. I began to pray and ask questions about serving with SIM, and heard only good things from the people I talked with.  (Plus, I would be close to Casa de Amor!)

In October I sent in my application, lots of references, a complete physical exam, and a psychological evaluation. I waited to hear back, and in November I got an email saying that I was invited to attend SIM Start! This is a long weekend where I meet the staff of SIM, and they can meet me, so we can see if it will be a good fit. At the end of the weekend you have what is called an exit interview, and figure out the next steps.

For Christmas, I asked for a plane ticket to Charlotte, North Carolina, and this past weekend flew to Charlotte and SIM headquarters for SIM Start. It was a long (but GREAT!) weekend, filled with interviews, a meeting with a psychologist, history of SIM, and an explanation of core values that SIM holds. It was also very exciting to get to talk with the other 30-ish people, both couples and individuals from all ages and walks of life, that are feeling led to ministry of some sort.

I would love to ask you all (the three of you still reading…J) to pray with me this next week that God would make clear which ministry opportunity is the best fit for the specific gifts and passions He has given me.  The next step will be to choose one, and then apply for that specific position!

I am so thankful for the community that I am surrounded by, and the love God shows through you all. I would love to talk more with you, if you are interested, about this process, and how God is working in it!

Hasta pronto! 

Being still.

So even though I am not in Bolivia right now, God has been showing more and more that He is still making beautiful things. There are no pictures of cute kids, but I did want to share what God has been teaching me, because it has been so encouraging!

I have been back from Bolivia for about a month and a half, and finally feel like things are starting to get into a routine. I have had the opportunity to spend this semester taking classes to prepare to go somewhere long term. I am hoping it will be Bolivia, but for now I am waiting to see where God will lead!:)  Anyway, all that to say that in the course of this semester God has really been working on my heart, and convicting me of attitudes I didn’t even know where there. So I told my small group of girls that I was praying for God to make me miserable in the things I looked to other than Him for satisfaction/love/acceptance. One of the girls, Hannah, laughed and told me to watch out, but I continued to pray it – because I thought I knew how God would answer it.

I expected to be miserable as I looked to my friends rather than Jesus to make me feel loved and accepted, and although I did, there was something else too. For a couple of weeks, I just felt this weird discontentment, and tried to explain it away and fix it. I thought that I was missing the kids in Bolivia, or maybe that I wasn’t where I needed to be. I tried to figure out this feeling, and couldn’t. Then one night last week I was talking with a friend, Miriam, and told her about the feeling. I told her I had this awful feeling, and couldn’t figure out what it was. I dropped her off at home, and the feeling wouldn’t go away. I drove home asking the Lord to show me, and a song came on the radio that I didn’t like. I almost changed it, but didn’t. The chorus of the song just repeats “Jesus is the answer…” over and over. I had to laugh, because I knew Jesus was the answer, but I had been hoping for something a little more specific. I got out of my car, went inside, and started to write out a prayer. I started to complain to Jesus about how miserable I had been, and then stopped. Until that point I hadn’t described the way I was feeling as miserable, but when I did I laughed. I had been praying for the past two weeks for God to make me miserable in the things I looked to other than Him, and He had. But I had been too blind to see it. I kept thinking that the answer to getting rid of this feeling was to do more. To make myself busier, to build more friendships, or work harder. And as I looked to those things, God made me miserable (like I prayed) so that I could see that that’s not what He wants. He wants us to rest in Him, and His love. He is more than enough to satisfy us, and yet it is so tempting to try to prove ourselves or find our identity in the things He has created, rather than Him.

God brought the verse that says “Be still and know that I am God” to my mind, and so I looked it up. I thought that WAS the whole verse, but saw that there was more. Psalm 46:10 says “Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations. I will be exalted among the earth.” I had heard this verse so many times, but only the first part. And the second part is the good part! God does have a heart for all the nations, and He calls us to join Him in what He’s doing, but it’s not in our own strength! He tells us to be still, and to know Him – then he will be exalted!

I want to encourage you to ask the Lord to make you miserable when you look to other things besides Him to make you feel fulfilled. But be smarter than me, and don’t take two weeks to listen. J Be still and know, that He is God. Stop feeling like you need to do more, and remember that Jesus already did more than enough. We can rest in that, and be filled with who He is, so that the whole earth knows!